I recently went on a shopping trip to pick up some things for the kids. Normally, I love going out shopping for them, but on this particular day, something I witnessed while in the store left me with a really sick feeling in my stomach.
There was a mother with her 3 children that passed me in the store and wound up the next aisle over from me. I guess the children were about 5 or 6, 7 or 8, and 9 or 10. The oldest one was a girl and the 2 younger ones were boys. This woman was screaming at her children, especially the youngest boy. Now, I fully realize that being a parent can be very frustrating sometimes. There have been times when feeling like I was at "the end of my rope" in a situation, I have had to walk away and cool off for a few moments. I have had moments of total exasperation that I have begged and pleaded with my children, almost to the point of tears, to just "please cooperate with Mommy." Come on now, I mean... what parent has not felt like this at one point or another (I'm just talking about the walking away & cooling off and the begging & pleading).
This woman was just plain mean and in my opinion, does not deserve to be a parent. She was calling her children stupid. Several times, she threatened that "someone was going to call the police on them". She repeatedly told them to shut up. She was swearing at them. I could not believe what I was hearing. When I walked past the aisle they were down, she grabbed the youngest boy by the collar of his jacket and began to drag him down the aisle. The little boy was crying and was looking at me as I passed. I just wanted to scoop him up and hold him, hug him, and tell him that everything was going to be alright.
I'm not sure that words can adequately describe how I felt that day. Now mind you, I was not the only one who was appalled by this woman's behavior. Several other shoppers had looks of disgust on their faces. A couple of women shook their heads. One woman looked at me and said "I can't believe that." I was so bothered by what I heard and saw that I spoke to the store manager. His response was not what I expected it would be. He told me that "we don't like to get involved in people's parenting styles." You have got to be kidding me !!! This woman's behavior was at the least, disruptive and upsetting to not only myself, but also other customers. To me, her behavior was borderline abusive if not more. I was so upset when I got in my car, I called my husband and cried. When I got home, we discussed the situation further and John suggested that I should have called the police of the city I was in while shopping. If I ever find myself in a situation like this again, and I hope to god that I don't, that is exactly what I will do. Never again will I go to the store manager.
I've been thinking about this incident and wonder if there is more that I could have done. Should I have tried to talk to the woman ? Should I have tried to console the little boy ? Should I have called the police ? Am I wrong for thinking what happened was horrible ? Any thoughts, input, or comments that anyone has would be very appreciated.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Hey Michelle,
I was recently in the same situation in church. I did talk to the Mother and the child that was obviously misbehaving for attention...albeit it was negative attention. We'll have to chat about my experience sometime! Unfortunately, there are all types of people with all types of parenting. We can't save them all, but when it is right under our nose, perhaps we can make a difference. Who knows. I love your blog and your updates and pictures. The kids are adorable. :) Kristen V
Hey Michelle,
Good work with the blog!
I'm going to throw my $.02 in concerning the situation with the angry mother.
If at any point in time, you feel the children are being abused, call the police. End of story...
A store manager will not want to get involved, it really is not their job.
Attempting to talk to an angry mother about her parenting habits will not likely result in a positive outcome. If this person is verbally insulting her children, I'm sure her conversation with you would have been more colorful.
There is no excuse to insult and swear at a child. No parent EVER should call their child stupid. A parent is a child's biggest role model. If I was at the store and heard the mother call her child "stupid", I probabaly would have said something to her (but I, as a police officer, can do that, and follow up with the appropriate agency). I have spoken to a few people in my time for swearing and insulting their kids (but I will make every attempt to avoid doing it in front of the children.)
Now, to throw a twist into the story, think back to the time when we were kids, would people have felt the same way about the situation?
Would a mother dragging a child by the collar been as upsetting? Have you ever been dragged by your collar? I'm pretty sure I have..
Society today is always trying to tell parents how to raise their kids. A parent usually knows how to best deal with THEIR children (still no excuse for calling them "stupid"). If they are not "beating" their kids, it is usually best not to get involved.
Having known you for several years now, I am confident that you did the right thing. There is no doubt in my mind that if you felt the children were being abused, you would have acted immediately and called the police.
The situation you presented is just an example of a bad parent. Unfotunately, there is no law against that.
Anyways, that's my $.02. I hope to see you all soon. Take care, Big Ed
Post a Comment